Please meet Doña María Elena Zetino Herrera
One look at this photo, and you can see that this 93-year old woman has seen a lot in her years.
Madre Vilma says that Doña María is quite cheerful but often restless as well. She doesn’t remember the names of her children — and perhaps for a reason. Doña María’s husband passed away about 30 years ago; after that, two of her three sons passed. While these two sons were married with children, Doña María’s daughters-in-law made no effort to help her, nor did her grandchildren.
Doña María had one son remaining, but he has had his own struggles with alcoholism, and left his mother alone for days or weeks at a time without any food. Madre Vilma described for me the “little angels” that began to visit Doña María from time to time, bringing her food, and helping to care for her. These “angels” belong to a local organization that struggles with the overwhelming task of caring for abandoned elders in their villages.
After 10 years, though, these volunteers decided the elderly mother needed more than they could offer. They approached Madre Vilma for help, and she gladly took in Doña María.
As with any new arrival at any elder care home, Doña María struggled to adapt to her new surroundings. With time and patience and love, though, she eventually settled in.
It’s hard to explain to someone how distressing it can be for elders with dementia to be taken out of their surroundings or routine (for example, taken out for a dinner when all they’ve known for months or years is their elder care home, or to receive visitors from their past). Trust me when I say it’s distressing and unsettling for the elder.
And so, when Doña María’s neglectful, alcoholic son showed up one day for a visit with his mother, Doña María immediately became so distressed mentally and emotionally, she became restless and agitated and refused to eat or drink for a few days. She also couldn’t sleep.
When she finally settled in once again, Madre Vilma made the decision to notify the son that he shouldn’t visit again. Her priority is protecting these vulnerable elders, from threats both seen and unseen, and from those which are physical as well as emotional.
Here, Doña María acknowledges the camera after Sister Beronica, who is in charge of the kitchen, has served the snacks.
Thank you all for being amazing and beautiful human beings!
With gratitude,
Alicia Jean Demetropolis
