Now, please meet Shahadev Balami
I first met Shahadev nearly seven years ago, when I stayed at the elder care home in Pharping during my first trip to Nepal. His nonprofit started this elder care home in conjunction with a nurse’s organization in Kathmandu, and he runs it now. (You may recall a woman named Pushpa from previous emails. She lives on site and manages the facility day to day, including scheduling and managing the caregivers and the retired nurse who all work there.)
In our interview with Mann Badhu, Shahadev showed his humorous side by telling Mann we would keep his dead body safe at the elder care home. (Recall that Mann Badhu is legally dead.)
Back in about 2012, Shahadev told his guru that he wanted to start a nonprofit to serve the community. His guru told Shahadev to take care of the elders, because no one else was doing it. This was how the Senior Citizen Nursing Care Home of Pharping began.
Last year, he received word from a social service agency that there was an elderly woman who needed a place to live. She was collecting a pension, so could afford to help pay for her room and board, and she was fit and able to help around the property with cleaning, prepping vegetables, and laundry. The only catch: This woman was Dalit. The Untouchable caste.
As you may recall from a previous email, the caste system in Nepal was outlawed in the 1960s, but it’s still alive and well if you just take a look around.
When Shahadev emailed me to say that we had a new resident, he told me the news of her caste, and then said, “But I don’t care about such things, didi. To me, all mothers are my mother.” Of course, this mother has a home in Pharping now, and Saani is a wonderful, funny, intelligent, and refreshing addition to the home. No one acknowledges her caste, not the residents nor the caregivers.
Shahadev has an income from his stationery store, and is always up front and honest with me about the costs to support each resident at the home. He offers information before I even ask. This elder care home is his passion, not his job. All this is why we love to work with him, and why we’re happy to support this elder care home.
As Chhultim and I toured his care homes, we chatted about the challenges of caring for elders as they aged — and the added difficulties of caring for an elderly person who had their own, unique physical challenges in addition to the normal aging process (think: dementia). I told him about Kapitah, the woman whose legs were permanently folded against her body her entire life. Many of you helped us pay for her private caregiver during her final months.
I agreed to put Chhultim and Shahadev in touch with one another. They are like-minded, kind-hearted, gentle human beings, and I knew they’d get along immediately. While we all have high hopes that one day in the future we can find a way to work together, as it all stands right now, Shahadev and our nonprofit don’t have nearly the funds we’d need to take in the elders from Chhultim’s home.
When I received photos from Shahadev on the day that Chhultim and Sita toured the elder care home in Pharping, I just about wept with joy. I cannot begin to express my happiness that these beautiful, kind souls have become friends. I feel as if my family has expanded, and somehow my heart has expanded with it all.
Just look at this photo above! This is genuine love on Sita’s face. There is no judgment, no fear of touching each other. Saani, of the Dalit caste, holding hands with a woman who’s missing part of her left arm. To Sita’s left is Saanu, our newest resident.
In corporate speak, there’s an acronym of BHAG (pronounced BEE-hag). It stands for Big, Hairy, Audacious Goal.
Our BHAG is to rescue elders from the streets, help build an elder care home to house them, and to set the home up with a sustainable food program to help the home reduce their expenses.
We’re not there yet, but with our growing family full of compassionate people, we’re sure to get there soon.
Thank you all for your patience these past few weeks. I’ll be in touch again soon with an update from the remote Tamang village where we’re helping the elders there build new chicken pens and coops, and where we will eventually help them build greenhouses as well.
Stay well, and remember to shower the people you love with love. 🙂
Alicia Jean Demetropolis
The Global Humanity Initiative
